05 May 2022

This was an unusual read for me. It’s a book way out of my comfort zone. At times, I was not sure if I completely understood where the story was headed. However, as a mother, I found this story both disturbing and deeply moving. Vanda is a troubled single mother of a six-year-old boy. She lives in a changing world and senses an end is near.

This is a translated work and my first encounter with this author. Marion Brunet tells the story mainly from Vanda’s perspective but also shares some of Simon and Noé’s views. She adds a lot of scenic detail, bringing the coastal town in the South of France to life. While giving you a graphic picture of police brutality during striker demonstrations. The author brings various topics into play, including poverty, mental health, police violence, global warming and a devoted single mother’s daily struggles.

Vanda escapes the small village of her childhood where she lived in the shadow of a sexually promiscuous mother. Chasing her dreams she enrols in art school, however, when she discovers that she is not quite good enough she drops out. Living a life of freedom, drugs and alcohol when she discovers that she is pregnant. Motherhood was not part of her plan, and she is unsure how she will deal with it.  When Noé is born, she falls in love with this little person – her little Limpet.

Vanda tries her best, despite not always doing the right thing for Noé she adores him. She becomes dependent on this child to provide calm and comfort to her life. Facing an uncertain life with very little security Vanda witnesses the changes in her world which add to her anxiety. When Simon, Noé’s father returns to town unexpectedly and demands custody of Noé, Vanda sees the end. Can she escape and keep little Noé by her side, or is this really the end?

The idea of a child being raised by such an unstable person broke my heart. While at the same time feeling Vanda’s adoration for her son, she adored that little boy and was not the worst mother out there – but her son did not always come first. This little boy and his ability to read his mother’s moods at such a young age stole my heart. The author did a fabulous job creating this little character. Noé was my motivation to keep flipping the pages, I had to find out what was going to happen to him.

Vanda is an extremely complex character. She had an unsavoury childhood which revolved around her mother’s sexuality. When she finally manages to distance herself she discovers life is not that easy. She learns that she is nothing special, that she is just another face in the crowd. No-one cares. Soon she is left feeling as if she does not matter – only Noé loves her – and sometimes she is too hard on him – leaving her feeling guilty. She has an almost unnatural dependence on her child. Vanda had to face the harsh realities of life on her own while trying to raise a little boy who she adored. No wonder she turned to violence to protect the only thing that mattered in her world.

This is a moving, sad story about a single mother struggling through life in an ever-changing world. It is almost disturbing at times, but highlights how much change in the world we are faced with and how easy it can be to want to give up – to simply accept the end of life as we know it and surrender to an end we are sure is coming.